TheAce wrote:All right
Prologue: The girls Jack arrives at the estate in his car. Carmen answers door and introduces herself, mentioning she shares the estate with two other girls. She invites Jack in, calling him by his first name even though he introduced himself as "Detective Harker"
Scene 1:Jack decides to start his investigation, leading to the first choice. The Balcony leads to a talk with Carmen over drinks, which ends in a foot job. The open floor room (formerly a ballroom) leads to a sparring match against Jaq, which ends in him giving her a massage, or the cellar, where a mysterious invisible force plays pranks on him, culminating in an invisible reach around.
Scene 2: Jack, now stuck with the girls after a freak storm (hmm, I wonder what could have caused it?) decides to read in the study. He ends up picking up a journal, hidden between two books. The cover says "Property of J. and M. Harker." He begins to read it, discovering it is an account of their studies into monster behavior after the events of Dracula, and mentions their bloodline will ALWAYS attract the paranormal. He starts to wonder how the book got there when one of the Girls interrupts him (again, player chooses which one)
Scene 3: Jack decides to read more of the journal, feeling a connection with J. and M. Harker. he gets to the last page, where it reveals an important secret. Afterwards he decides to discuss it with one of the girls.
Epilogue: Depends on which girl you've spent time with.
Stop! What you're doing, cutting into several scene, is the last thing to do, when the story will be completely defined.
Here's how the scenario should be organized:
1 - Characters: Ok, you have described them.
2 - The goal: What is the story direction, the goal to obtain at the end. examples:
Nanny's day: will the wedding happen, despite the manipulations of the housekeeper?
Casle whispers: Will Geraldine marry Gregory or will the past prevent the marriage.
3 - interactions between the characters: who likes who, who hates who? what is the aim of each of them?
4 - What scenes will help to show the personality and the feelings of each characters?
5 - What scenes will help to go towards the goal and what scene will be hindrances ?
Once you have a clear idea of all that, you can begin to cut the story into parts and scenes.